The Mother Ship Sets Sail.

Well, we’ve sold the Mother Ship. That is her, pulling out of the driveway.



I was a little sad to see her go.



I now have no wheels. I hope we find something soon. I do believe I have mentioned that I cannot drive The Teenager’s Truck.

I am hoping for an Excursion. Sir D is hoping for another 12 passenger van only this time with a diesel engine.

We’ll see.

Methinks a Dilemma is Brewing

The Teenager.



The Teenager’s Truck.



Kelly Blue Book says the Teenager’s Truck is worth around $1000.

The estimate to fix the newly acquired dent on Teenager’s Truck is around $1000.

I see a problem…

A Whole Lot of Nothing

We can all breathe a sigh of relief. The library is back online. I can renew my books and I can request new ones. All is right with the world again. They even have this new feature where I can click on a 'renew all' button and it will renew all the books I have out and I don't have to click on an individual book. This is a very nice feature when one has out 143 books.

On a completely unrelated note, Will's truck got hit yesterday. He has a very nice size dent on the cab of his truck right behind the drivers side door. The door opens and closes fine, but it sure looks a sight!

Sir D thinks the ins co will probably total it. It has 5 million miles on it and the dent is in a place that will be expensive to repair. So, Will might be without wheels for a while. Or he might just choose to pocket the $, keep the dent and save for another car. I'm just grateful that this accident was not his fault. He was not even in the car at the time so the ins co can NOT raise our rates agin!

On another completely unrelated note, I'm going to take Eve shopping for some summer clothes today. Lord help me. Seriously, I do this with great prayer. She is so picky about her clothes, and not in the way you would think. It's not about fashion it's about comfort. It has to 'feel' right or she simply won't wear it. Sadly, we're not made of money so she'll have to do her best to find something that 'feels' right at Target or Walmart.

This must be what Sir D feels like before he goes hunting; tempered optimism. Will we find something? Please let us find something!

Some Call It A Sickness

I think I may have an addiction. Dictionary.com gives me this definition of the word…

ad•dic•tion [uh-dik-shuh n]

–noun

The state of being enslaved to a habit or practice or to something that is psychologically or physically habit-forming, as narcotics, to such an extent that its cessation causes severe trauma.

My library has ceased its online option for over a weak now and it is causing severe trauma. I can’t request books, I can’t check my account, I can’t renew books, I can’t even look to see if a particular book is even in my library’s possession.

I am told that they are ‘updating the system’. Yeah, whatever.

I am becoming psychologically unhealthy. I have this paranoia that my library has finally decided to cut me loose. I have over 100 books out at any given time and I think they have finally gotten wise to this.

They are singling me out. They have taken away my online privileges. They say it will all be working, new and improved, by tomorrow. We’ll see.

I don’t know what I’ll do if my supplier cuts me off.

Perhaps we’ll have to move into another supplier’s territory.

20 Things I Will Never Do

Wish I had more laundry

Take part in any sort of public speaking event

Sing where anyone who is not bound to me by blood or marital commitment can hear me

Take part in any sort of spelling contest

Go so green that I give up air conditioning

Walk away from a chocolate buffet without partaking heavily

Say “Hay let’s go for a hike!” when it is over 70 degrees

Give up WiFi

Say “No thank you” to someone offering me coffee

Get in debt again

Go jogging before 7 am

Go jogging period

Decide to gain a few pounds

Go into any sort of math related field

Say “Hey! I get to go to the Dentist tomorrow! YaHoo!”

Say “Hey! I get to go to the ObGyn tomorrow! YaHoo!”

Not melt when any of my kiddoes say “Mom, I love you”

Say, “Hay, Sir D, add more garlic to that”

Say, “Hay Sir D, put some more onions in that.

Rue the day I started this thing called blogging!

Thanks BooMama for the idea!
So, what are your 20 things?

Your Virtual Lunch Is On Me

Today is a day to remember. A day to say thank you to those who’ve made it their life’s work to keep our country safe.

A few years ago my friend and I were escaping our children having lunch together at a local restaurant. We saw a table of Army Reservist nearby. We ate our lunch, they ate their lunch. All was well.

My friend and I were deep in a very important conversation, or not, when we saw something that still makes me smile and be ashamed of myself at the same time.

There was an older couple nearby who were also enjoying their lunch. When it was time for them to go they called the waiter over and talked to him for a minute, then they talked to the manager for a minute. This little old couple was in my direct line of sight so I caught the whole exchange and I have to admit I was curious as to what was going on.

They got worked out whatever was their problem, paid, and left the restaurant.

A few minutes later the Army guys asked for their check. They were also in my direct line of sight, but on the other side of the dining room.

The manager came up to their table and told them that their meals had been paid for by another diner, who would like to remain anonymous. He handed them a little note that I am assuming said something along the lines of…

“Thank you for making it your life’s work to keep our country safe.”

I couldn’t agree more, and I am ashamed I don’t say enough myself.

Thank you, men and women of our Armed services, for making it your life’s work to keep our country safe.

God Bless Air Conditioning

It’s cold again in my house.

God Bless freon and A/C repairman, even if they charge an arm and a leg to come out on a Saturday.

I’ll gladly give up my arm and leg for cool air.

I've got your back, but only if there's A/C

The blog may be a little slow over the coming few days. It seems that the A/C in my house has decided to stop working. It blows air alright, but it does not cool the house.

It is HOT in here.

I don’t want to be in here.

I am going to go somewhere with great A/C until mine is fixed. I’m sorry. I’d like to say that I am the kind of person who hangs in there to the end. Who battles it out. The last man standing.

I’m not.

Unless there is A/C.

A Day at the Pool

We had a little end of school party today, even though technically the kids still have some math to do.

We went to the pool with another family. We had a great time. I was determined to get some exercise. (It seems my swimsuit shrunk a bit while in storage over the winter) I swam laps and then tread water until I thought my legs were going to fall off. Who knew you could feel the burn while immersed in water?

After all this, when I was about to get out and have some adult conversation with my friend, I was begged to join in the game the kids were setting up. It was just the 5 little girls at first; teens are way too cool for such childishness. I relented because I was determined to appreciate every moment with my kids today.

We started playing the game ‘Colors’, though I am sure it goes by many names, or perhaps it is a game the kids just made up on the spot. I won’t bore you with all the rules, but it involved chasing each other around the pool.

As it turns out, all the water treading and lap swimming was unnecessary. Lawsey Mercy, those kids wore me out! But it was worth every second. By the time we were done even the teens were playing and laughing right along with the rest of us.

Here is my question though; why is it that after a day at the pool where the kids were twice as active as I was, I’m the one who is ready for bed, NOW, and the kids are still going, going, going, just like the Energizer Bunny?

Sadness

1 Thessalonians 4: 13 But we do not want you to be uninformed, brethren, about those who are asleep, so that you will not grieve as do the rest who have no hope.

1 Corrinthians 13: 12 Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

There are things I don’t understand. Things like this. Minutes after hearing this tragic news, I also heard on the news about two other children who were hit by cars yesterday in DFW; one accidentally by his mother. All three were killed.

My human mind does not know how to process this information. To call this tragic seems not enough. To say it is horrible seems too mundane.

The only thing that gives comfort at these times is the thought that we do not mourn as those who have no hope, and one day we shall know fully.

My heart grieves for these families.

There is some fear, some trepidation of the unknown. What about my children? Why these children and not mine? Are mine next?

Only the Lord knows the number of our days. I don’t know how long any of my family will be on this earth, but I can tell you that I will hug my children a little harder today. I will be a little more grateful for the one day more I have with them.

A Letter To My Future Daughter-In-Laws

Dear, Future Daughter-In-Laws,

I want us to be friends. I know it may take time and we may not like each other right away, but it is important to me that we get along.

Because I want you to like me, I have tried to prepare my boys for you. I have taught them how to sew on a button.


It took a while, but I think they got it.


I have tried to teach them how to cook so if you ever go out of town, they won’t eat only fast food. This is not going so well, but I have not given up.

I have also taught them how to clean. They clean bathrooms, do dishes, mop and the like. Don’t ever let them play dumb and tell you they don’t know how to clean. They DO! I’ve made sure of that.

I have taught them to be kind and loving, to speak nicely, and if they don’t have anything nice to say, to not say anything at all, and to treat others the way they would like to be treated.

I have also taught them that the answer to "Does this make me look fat?" is always "NO!"

There is one area however, that I have failed…one area I don’t think they will ever learn. In this area I must apologize. It is likely you will have to pick up their dirty laundry and put it in the hamper. I don’t understand this inability to put dirty laundry in its proper place. They know how to wash it, dry it, and put it away, but somehow they don’t seem to know how to take it from their bodies and put it in the proper dirty clothing receptacle.

I hope you will like me in spite of my teaching deficiencies.

Your Future Mother-In-Law

I'll Take Random for $1000 Alex.

Just in case you were wondering, I am not still in bed. I had to get up early (well, early for summer) and go to that appointment.

It is done.

It was not as awful as I remember, thought it certainly was not pleasant. One tolerable slightly less than horrible nice thing was this doctor had an actual cotton hospital gown thing to put on instead of the paper gown. That was tolerable slightly less than horrible nice. Obviously it was a woman doctor. Only a woman doctor would think of that.

On another note, I am driving a friends mini van right now while they borrow the Mother Ship to go on a trip with her parents in tow (and of course their 5 kids). They made noises about wanting to buy it from us when we sell it. We are considering selling it because Sir D thinks we need something bigger louder manlier with an engine better designed for towing.

I filled up their mini van for around $50. That is amazing. I had no idea you could fill up a motor vehicle of any kind for under $90. Astounding!

Now I must go and begin washing the 5,623,497 loads of laundry clogging my laundry room. It could take a while. I didn’t want you to think my summer would be full of lounging by the pool. Worry not. It might take me all summer just to get caught up on laundry.

The Beginning of Summer

It is 10 am and I am still in bed.

I have been sitting here with my coffee and my laptop reading blogs, news articles, email, sewing tutorials etc.

The boys left early to go help their uncle who is getting ready to move. The girls are cleaning their room (though all the giggling makes me wonder)

Sir D is at work.

I LOVE summer. I don't love the heat but I love the slower pace. This is our first week of summer. No AWANA, no Scottish Rite for Ann, no Co op, no small group, no Wednesday night youth group. No commitments.

I LOVE summer.

I think I am going to get up and make the burp cloths to go with the blanked I made, or maybe I'll make some cookies to take up to Sir D's new office (I believe in buying people's affections with sweets) maybe I'll take the girls to the pool...

...Or maybe I'll just stay right here in bed, because I can, because no one needs me right now.

How Glorious.

Hay! I'm a Sewer. (Not the Stinky Kind!)

LOOK WHAT I MADE! LOOK WHAT I MADE!

Please, those of you who sew, look away. Those of you who don’t sew, LOOK WHAT I MADE!



I have always wanted to learn to sew, but, well, who has time? I finally decided NOW was the time. I want to teach my daughters how to sew, and that is a bit tricky when I don’t know how myself.

I mentioned my desire to learn to sew to my aunt who is a quilter (blue ribbon winning quilts no less). She was quite happy to loan me her back-up machine. Her back up machine is a Bernina. Turns out, a Bernina is the Porch of the sewing machine world. I am learning how to sew on a $700 machine.

YIKES! No pressure or anything.

Today I got over my stickershockaphobia and got to work. Here is what I made. Isn’t it cute? A friend of mine is having his first baby. (Okay he’s not having it, his wife is). This is actually a guy I dated in high school. My SIL’s brother. Is that weird, to give a baby gift to a guy I once dated? He’s kinda like family, and I’m quite happily married thankyouverymuch! Okay, now that we’ve all decided giving a baby gift to an old boyfriend is NOT weird, we should all clap for my new skill!

Please don’t look too closely at the stitching. It is a bit tough not wandering all over. Sewing a straight seam is much harder than it looks.



Not bad for a first timer right? I’m going to make some burp cloths to go with the blanket too.



Whoo Hoo I’m a sewer! (As in one who sews not one who stinks.)

Only in Texas

Only in Texas does someone think this is a good idea.



Liquor and guns sold in the same establishment. This little shop has been open for years near my aunt and uncle’s house.



I laugh every time I see it.

God bless America.

I’m just like an Ornithologist except without all those years of education.

My aunt and uncle have a little bird oasis there on their ranch. They go through more bird seed than I would have thought possible.

All of their various bird feeders are right outside the large living room windows. In South Texas this is a boon, as no one in their right mind would sit outside to watch the birds.

We watched all the normal characters play across the stage; cardinals, lots of hummingbirds, red–winged blackbirds, cowbirds, blue jays, orioles, woodpeckers, and white winged doves.

It was all very exciting.

Eve is also a bird enthusiast. She loves to watch them and learn about them. On one of the many stops, Angela and I made, I found this little gem. It is a bird book that has great color pictures of birds, but that is not all, it also has a little button you can push to hear the sound the bird makes. How cool is that! It is not a cheap book and I am a cheap person, so I had a dilemma. Do I buy it? It is a $25 book. Can I bring myself to buy a $25 book when chances are good I could get on Amazon cheaper? Turns out, yes I can spend $25 on a book.

As we sat and watched the birds flit buy the windows, we listened to the bird sounds while sitting in air conditioned comfort. It was Glorious.

At one point I was sitting on the chair nearest the window doing nothing. Absolutely nothing, and no one was asking me any questions using the words ‘Mom, can I…’ or ‘Mom, can you…’. I might have mentioned this already, but it was glorious.

So there I am sitting and having complete thoughts, when a very colorful flash landed on the patio. I walked closer to the window to inspect. It was the most beautiful bird I think I have ever seen. It was almost tropical, something you’d expect to see in the Caribbean, not dry South Texas.

Because I am a calm and controlled person, I squealed for Angela and our Aunt to “COME SEE THE BIRD WITH ALL THE PRETTY COLORES!” Of course, because the glass is not quadruple paned, the squealing scared away the pretty bird before Aunt and Angela could get there.

Once I described the bird, my aunt started to squeal. A PAINTED BUNTING! YOU SAW A PAINTED BUNTING! THOSE ARE SO RARE, YOU ARE SO LUCKY TO HAVE SEEN A PAINTED BUNTING!

It seems all the squealing runs in the family.

Later that day my sister said, ‘Hay, that bird looks like a blue jay only green’. (She did not inherit the squealing gene it seems).

My aunt replied, A GREEN JAY! YOU SAW A GREEN JAY! THOSE ARE SO RARE, YOU ARE SO LUCKY TO HAVE SEEN A GREEN JAY!

Apparently Angela and I are like the cat nip of the bird world.

The Painted bunting did come back the next day, but did not cooperator very well for our little photo op. Here is the photo my sister took.

Here is a better photo.

Here is a photo of a Green Jay, the Green Jay never got close enough for us to snap a photo. Perhaps it was all the squealing.

Do They Sell Hula Girls in Vegas?

My sister and I went on a little road trip over the weekend. We have not gone on a road trip since…well I can’t remember.

We were both a little overly excited to run away from our responsibilities visit our aunt and uncle. Our uncle heard we were coming and fled the country was very sad he could not be there as he had to teach an anti-terrorism school in Mexico.

We drove my sister’s very large, black, new SUV. (This is Texas, every family is required to have at least one large SUV.)

She pulled up into my driveway on Friday morning and put a lay around my neck and said “welcome to your vacation.”

We were off.

We stopped at this little gift shop somewhere along our trip. My sister found a stick-on dancing hula girl. We had to have her.

I found some fake mustaches that I remember my husband said he wanted. I asked him where on earth he thought I was going to find fake mustaches for him. The Lord provided.

I called him at work to make sure he still needed them.

“Hello, this is Sir D” (he didn’t really say Sir D, he said his real name, but you all are smart enough to figure that out, right?)

“Hi honey, guess what!” I squeal.

“I’m going to have to call you back.” He says is his work voice that tells me he has someone in his office.

“Okay but real quick, do you still need those fake mustaches?”

A pause.

“Um, yes. If you could please take care of the procurement of the supplies that would be excellent.” Sir D said in his work voice.

My sister and I laughed about that all weekend!

We buy our dancing hula girl and fake mustaches and hop back in the new, shiny, black SUV and Angela sticks the Hula girl on the dash, right in the middle. As we pull back out onto the highway she begins to shake her unlikely shaped body back and forth. She is our mascot. She will hula us all the way to the ranch.

We watched her in silence for a while.



Then Angela said, “Crap. I just stuck a tacky hula girl to (insert her husband’s name here) new car.

“(insert her husband’s name here) is not going to think that is funny.”

"Surely Uncle has some go-be-gone or something that will get her off." I suggest.

We get to the ranch, with hula girl mocking us, swaying back and forth all the way, but never coming loose.

Well, Hula girl did eventually come off. She did not leave any residue on the shiny new car’s dash. We did not have to confess to (insert her husband’s name here) that we stuck a tacky hula girl on the dash of his new car.

Some people go on vacation, loose their minds and become overly spontaneous and gamble away their life savings. Angela and I just stick tacky things to a new car’s dash.

What happens on vacation only stays on vacation if you don’t stick it on your dash.

Words of wisdom my friends.

Scorpions and a Stuck Hula Girl

I'm back from Rancho Alacron.

We had a blast. We stayed up too late, we ate too much, and we saw scorpions. 2 scorpions.



I have many stories to tell. Tales of a stuck hula girl, fake mustaches, and sour-crout kolatchies.

Oh, and a painted bunting. I can't forget to tell you of the appearance of the very rare and beautiful painted bunting.



But first I must sleep...for many, many hours.

Two things.

1. Will and Bob did their many lawns today and all is well. All limbs and appendages are present and accounted for.

2. I am leaving for the Texas Hill Country Friday morning with my sister and NO ONE ELSE. We are going to visit my aunt and uncle on their ranch. Rancho Alacran. For those of you not familiar with the Spanish language, that is Scorpion Ranch. Because there are scorpions there.

But you know what isn’t there? Responsibility. Oh happy day!

I am not feeling completely well, thank you for asking Jane. But I’m leaving town anyway. Because I like to spread the germs far and wide I’m sure I’m not contagious anymore.

Oh, and one more thing. (That makes three, whoops.) Tonya, I would love for my boys to work for you. They are quite good at their jobs. They are also quite reasonably priced. However, I think the travel expenses might make it cost prohibitive.

Eat your veggies! (If you can afford it.)

I just paid 11.56 for asparagus. Just enough asparagus to feed my family of 6 as a side dish. eleven dollars and fifty six cents.

HOLY COW!

My husband got a bit of a raise with this new job, also we have paid off our debt.

I CAN'T TELL. ALL extra $ is getting eaten up, literally.

I can't imagine what we would be doing if we still had debt and Sir D was making less.

Yikes! 11:56! For Asparagus.

I'm not so good with the new technology...

I'm just so stinkin' excited! I figured out how to make a slide show! Brilliant!

These are some of my favorite photos of the kids and a few cousins.

Enjoy! (really, they're some of the most adorable kids ever)

We Don't Need No Stinkin' Safety Features.

The boys and Sir D have been working on our mower for a few evenings now. It is not working. Know what is working? Our grass's ability to grow very FAST.

With grass inching up ever so quickly and a non working mower, there was a since of urgency in getting it fixed.

At one point Sir D was just about to go buy a new one, but he had one more thing he wanted to try with the boys.

See the thing is, the boys have a mowing business and they need a working mower, so Sir D was working with them to fix it, or they were going to have to pitch in for a new one.

Last night at around 8:30 pm I heard a most joyous sound. The lawnmower running! Yippee!

When the boys came in the house with Sir D behind them, I told them I was really proud of them for sticking with it and fixing it! Then I asked how they did it.

Bob said, “We just had to disable most of the safety features and then we…” I stopped listening after the ‘disable safety features’ part. I looked at Sir D who smiled sheepishly.

I gave him the look.

He said “they’ll be fine.”

Just another typical day on the Hilltop.

I Might Run Mad!

Today here on the Hilltop we’re going to be talking about coughing; coughing, coughing and more coughing. Why? Because that is all I can hear or do and it is wreaking havoc on my creative abilities.

I have been trying to go on and live my bloggy life and not post every other day about the coughing. But the coughing, it is distracting!

Ann has been coughing since the first of April. That is over a month folks. They don’t call this the 100 days cough for nothing. Only 60 more to go. And I feel that I should point out her that this is not regular coughing. This is a hacking like no other.

Sir D has been coughing too. LOTS. He finally got on antibiotics and they are helping a bit. Eve and Bob are also coughing, but Eve has been on the antibiotics and she only has a small annoying cough. Bob also has the small annoying cough. Will has no cough. How has Will avoided this cough? I have no idea.

Guess whose turn it is now? Yep, it’s mine.

It started on Saturday.

I have an appointment today at 3 for my round of antibiotics. Oh, joy. My body so loves the antibiotics.

And might I add that typhoid Mary Ann is still coughing terribly. She missed 3 days of school last week, and I am not sure how much she’ll be attending this week. I am going to take her today, and we’ll see how she does.

The most frustrating thing in all of this is that even though we all KNOW it is Whooping Cough, it has not been officially diagnosed because apparently Whopping Cough is difficult to diagnosis, and impossible to after the patient has been on antibiotics.

Anyway, whine, whine, whine.

I am supposed to go visit my aunt and uncle with my sister this weekend. I hope I am well enough to do it (it is a 5 hour drive) and I hope the kids are well enough to be left home with Sir D.

Because people, I must get away from the coughing or I shall run mad!

The Stuff of Legends

*****If you have not seen this movie and want to be surprised, click away now. I will spoil it for you and I don't want to do that. Really I don't. So go on, go away until you have seen it, then come back here and read this. Or you can go ahead and read it and be upset, but don't say I didn't warn ya!*****

A month or so ago my teenage sons started nagging me about watching some ‘Legend’ movie. They had heard good things…it’s only pg-13…can we? Please Mom? Can we? Can we? Can we?

So I got on Netflix and requested it for Sir D and I to preview. I’m sorry but most Pg-13 movies are not appropriate for my 13 year old or his 16 year old brother. Heck, they’re not usually appropriate for me.

Once it got here, I read the case. Oh, boy. Zombies. I HATE zombies, or really, any kind supernatural in nature kind of thriller. Now give me a good spy flick and I’m happy. Jason Bourne? Jack Ryan? Love it! The Undead? Notsomuch.

So last night Sir D and I got comfy on the couch and turned on the creepy movie. (The sacrifices I make for my kids!)

I must say…I was shocked. I think Will Smith said damn a few times when he was about to be devoured by some icky undead things (can ya blame him?), but other than that, NO BAD LAUGUAGE. Also, NO nudity. None. The camera did not even quickly pan over someone’s cleavage or some scantily clad girl on a billboard. NOT ONE THING.

Then- and this was the most shocking thing in all the movie, it was even more shocking than the Leader of the Undead jumping out from the dank corner to attack Will Smith in a dark warehouse- they prayed in the movie. Not like a ‘dear higher power who may or may not exist’ or a pious ‘Oh Holy Father in heaven who is to great for us mortals’ but a real prayer. Almost like the kind of prayer I would pray; a prayer of safety for a husband who was going to be left behind to save the world. (Sir D does a lot of world-saving, just so ya know.)

Then at the end ***Spoiler coming*** Will Smiths character gives his life to save human kind. Just like that. He saw only one way to save all of mankind and it required him to sacrifice his life to save others.

It was almost like a hero tale from ye olden days.

Now, don’t get me wrong. It was an icky, creepy, scary, yucky, zombie movie. But it was a CLEAN icky, creepy, scary, yucky, zombie movie with a great message.

Who woulda thunk it?

And just as a side note…I had zombie nightmares last night, but I did not go climb in bed with my parents because, well, I am the parent.

Stand Up Straight!

The expense joys of parenthood.

Eve had a capped baby-tooth molar that was loose back in Oct/Nov. When I took her into the dentist for a checkup, he noticed it and told her to work on getting it out.

Well, you know, the holidays, life got busy, excuse, excuse…

She commented on it still not being out at the beginning of April. I had totally forgotten. The tooth underneath was trying to come up (you could see it off to one side) and the tooth still was not out!

So I bribed her and told her I’d give her $10 if she could get it out by the end of April. I figured it would be cheaper than going to the dentist and having it pulled.

Well, she got it out the night of April 30th. (Nothing like taking it down to the wire!).

When I looked in her mouth I realized that the molar coming in is completely sideways! The part I can see poking through the gum on the top is the side of her tooth! It is actually aimed into her mouth, making a protrusion in the inner jaw! UGH!!!

I’ve got an appointment with our orthodontist (that we just paid off for Will’s braced 3 months ago) on Wednesday.

So here’s the question. What is the ortho going to do? Any clues? Please tell me he's just going to speak sternly to the tooth and it'll stand up straight.

I want to prepare her if I can. UGH! If it’s not one expense thing it’s another expense.