A Little Jane

I seem to be on a Bronte kick. It all started when someone recommended the book Jane by April Linder to me. I read it rather quickly. I liked it fairly well. It is classified as a young adult fiction, I think, but I'd rate it as a pg 13. I don't think I'd let my young teen daughter read it, but for an adult book, it's pretty clean.

After I finished that book it dawned on me that, while I've seen several movie adaptations, I've never actually read the classic! So I hopped my happy little self on down to the library and got the original Jane Eyre. Um, WOW. How did I make it to the ripe old age of 29 (shut up), having never read Jane Eyre? Well, of course, now that I've read the book, I need to watch the movie again to see how it compares.

I found this version it Costco and snapped it up. Honestly, it's my favorite version. I think Ciaran Hinds makes the best Mr. Rochester. But, well, Masterpiece Theater did make a newer version recently so of course I had to request that from my library. That guy is way too young and handsome to be Mr. Rochester, but overall it's nicely done.

Then someone told me about this book, Romancing Miss Bronte! That is now next on my 'to be read' list.

I have 5 million other things to be doing. This is not the best time for my little foray into the Bronte sisters. Yet here I am!

I will leave you with this, my favorite quote from Jane Eyre...

Laws and principals are not for the times where there is no temptation: they are for moments such as this, when body and soul rise in mutiny against their rigor; stringent are they; inviolate they shall be. If at my individual convenience I might break them, what would be their worth? They have a worth- so I have always believed; and if I cannot believe it now it is because I am insane-quite insane: with my veins running fire, and my heart beating faster than I can count its throbs. Preconceived opinions, forgone determinations, are all I have at this hour to stand by: there I plant my foot.

I think Charlotte Bronte could teach us all a thing or two.

Teetering

So, can you stand one more ‘woe is me, my children are growing up’ post? No. Okay, I promise, I’ll keep it light.

Bryce started EMT/Fire Academy yesterday. By the end of May he’ll be completely certified and ready to hire on to a department. Which is weird because he’s only 5. He’s still just a cute little blond thing wearing Osh Kosh overalls and playing on a fire engine…



Sigh, I guess that was a while ago.



Gunnar is swift on his heels. His classes at the community college started today and the minute he turns 18, he’ll be at the EMT/Fire Academy as well.



This is a fun and exciting stage for a momma to watch. It’s hard and bittersweet to watch your babies grow up, but it’s also exciting. They both stand there with their feet on the edge, their wings fully outstretched, their bodies teetering, any minute now they’ll sail off from my nest. I can’t go with them, I can only watch. Do momma birds get to yell directions from the nest? I shall have to research this.

I couldn’t be prouder of my boys. Really. I suppose if they have to grow up into men, they are at least doing a good job of it. I hear all the time of their hard work, their willingness to help, their kindness to others, and occasionally their inclination to do donuts in the church parking lot late at night. But we’ll forgive that last part.

Finding Joy

I am weary of being frugal. I am weary of being cautious. I am weary of being sensible. I am weary of hearing ‘wait’ and ‘not yet’ and ‘maybe, someday’. I want my someday now.

Is that selfishness speaking? Possibly. Probably.

I don’t feel my motives are selfish, or not wholly so anyway.

And yet things don’t change. Things never change.

I can try. I can push. I can endeavor to make something happen under my own power. But that never ends well.

So I wait, and I watch, and I see others prosper and I try not to grow too discouraged.

Then I feel guilty because so many have it so much worse than I do. And yet I whine about my misfortune. Ungrateful wretch that I am, I want more.

It’s ironic that the word I chose for 2011 (Or should I say, chose me?) is Joy. I don’t feel joyful. It is beginning to dawn on my dim mind, that joy is not a feeling, or not always. Joy is a choice, and one often made in spite of feelings.

I have a lot to learn this year.

WholeHeart Mother Conference

I heart Sally!

Adios 2010!

This is how we ended 2010.

2010, I've had just about enough of you. Don't let the door hit ya on the way out!

The best gift...

Yes, yes we did.


Why? You ask. I have no idea. I think I experience some sort of seizure or brain injury and it momentarily altered my personality, and I bought rodents.

The girls were completely shocked.




The thing is, I wanted an electronics-free Christmas. I am tired of buying things that need to be monitored. Everything in this house hooks up to the internet and the internet is a wonderful thing, but it requires some attention. It's a bit like a dark alley, you can't just let kids wander down it willy-nilly. You must be in attendance. I am tired of wandering down the dark alley with my children.

So this Christmas? No electronics.

We got stuff for our sons' trucks that they needed. Mats, new seats, and the like. This was Dave's department. I bought Dave some part for the car. I have no idea what it is. He sent me the link, I ordered it. Romantic, no?

And the girls got rodents.

I think I like my gift the best. A new necklace...sort of. I am not a real jewelry person. I don't wear much. My wedding ring is just a simple band. Anything more and I catch it on stuff. I normally wear a simple, gold, cross neckless. I have for years. That's it in the jewelry department.

When I turned 16 my aunt and uncle (who I lived with) bought me a ruby and diamond stud set of earrings. I loved those earrings. Wore them for years. Well, a few years ago, I lost one. I was very, very sad. The other one sat, sad and lonely, in my jewelry box.

This year, for Christmas, Dave took that sad, lonely, earring and had it made into a pendant for me to wear on my necklace. I LOVE it! It's simple, I can leave it on all the time, and best of all, it has a history and a story.



So? What was your favorite gift this year?

Merry Christmas!

Waiting...and Growing Up

Last night Dave and I and the girls went to a Life Group Christmas party. We are not actually part of a Life Group but we are friends with most of the people in the group so were invited. We had a wonderful time. We ate, we laughed, we talked, we sang, we played games we had a wonderful time.

We are considering joining the group. There are a few things holding me back. One is that despite my best efforts to the contrary, it seems there is something going on every night of the week for at least one member of the family. It’s not like when the kids were little and I was in control of all schedules and I could make sure we were at home more than we were not. Now the kids are bigger, one even an adult, and they make their own schedules. There is the nights Dave has to work late, and my bible study, and the youth group meeting, and the college bible study, and AWANA, and then the social events that are associated with each of those groups. As it stands there is one night a week we are all home. I don’t like that.

And yet, that seems to be the way it is. The kids are older. They are not even going to live here for much longer. It’s hard to imagine. So we improvise, and we make due, and we adjust.

Take Advent for instance. Advent is very important to me. We have always done Advent. Every night for 4 weeks leading up to Christmas we eat a nice dinner together, we light the candles, we read the scripture and we talk. We’ve read the Jotham’s Journey books, we’ve read other devotionals we’ve done Proclamation Ornaments, we’ve done it various ways but the idea is the same. Every night, together, studying God’s word and waiting on Jesus’ birthday.

Last year was a horrid disappointment. I tried to make it mandatory that he kids be home for dinner. It’s only 4 weeks. It didn’t work. I was disappointed and frustrated and the kids were annoyed. It’s not like they are out on the town. They have legitimate, important things to do. They are developing their own lives. I can’t make it like it was. I have to change too.

So this year, we’ve done Advent scripture and candle lighting with whoever is here for dinner. The mandatory event is Sunday lunch. There have been days of Advent this year where we’ve not done it at all in the evenings and instead the girls and I will do it at lunch during our homeschool time. It’s kinda sad, but it’s much less stressful and harmonious to the changing family dynamic. The kids are growing up and changing and I can’t stop it, so I guess I’m going to have to grow and change with them.


(My adorable children, before they went and grew up)

Elves!

I spent a ridiculous amount of time yesterday elfing my family. Then we laughed our heads off. Seriously, this is an addictive activity!

And now the kids...

Christmas Photo Attempt, Revisited.

Once again, I decided to attempt an impromptu Christmas Photo. We were camping over Thanksgiving this year and the surroundings were unique and beautiful. THE SWAMP! How can you not love that?? I mean, who else would have a Christmas photo taken in the swamp. Well, except those who actually live in the swamp.

So I decided to line up the crew, including the dog this year, and get that photo! Yeah, that never works. One problem was that, well, we were camping so we looked a mess! No one has any nice clothes, and the kids were a bit dirty, I mean, we were camping in the swamp after-all!

So...here goes.


Smile, Everyone! Wait, where's Annika?


There she is! Wow, that hair's a mess!

Um, Annika, what's with that face?

Annika, look at the camera!

Really, Gunnar?

And again with the goofy face, Gunnar.



Nice trash can.

Evelyn! And I don't really want to send out a Christmas card featuring Violet's bottom!

Gunnar again with the Stink-eye.



And this is what happens when you tell him to stop with the stink-eye.


I guess this one's not bad.

Why did I decide to do this again?