Monday, April 9, 2007

Perspective




Things about 15yods, to help me have perspective…
He loves to ride motorbikes – he does not watch much TV, none in prime time.

He would rather play soccer with his friends than “hang out”.

When he ran into the word sex in a book, he brought it to me and asked if it was appropriate. (The book was referring to someone of the female sex.)

He is failing Physical Science – He studies the Bible without prompting, because he wants to.

He did not study for his math test and failed – He has been apologizing on his own when he knows he has done wrong, and says he will work harder.

He loves to read and reads well, many adult level books – He hates math.

He has a tendency to be lazy and not try as hard as he should – He has never done drugs, nor does he even know what many of them are.

He is not as kind to his siblings as I would like – He does know how to behave, all the adults that spend any time with him think he hung the moon.

He tends to show more attitude than I like – He actually likes to hang out with his dad, uncles, and his dad’s friends.

While I’m sure he knows about the birds and the bees, (he and his dad had the talk years ago) he has no first hand experience!

He is not interested the female sex, or dating much, he is more interested in his soccer ball than I would like, and has no interest at all in science or math.

He is more interested in soccer and his motorbike than taking drivers ED!!!

He does not seem to have much drive, he thinks things are fine the way they are – contentment is a good thing, right?

He is happy to wear clothes from Wal-Mart and could not tell you the difference between a store brand and a name brand – he has no desire to work hard to earn $.

He only works just enough to keep his motorbike running, and that is all.

I know this list seems random, but I am trying to gain some perspective when it comes to my almost 16 year old son. He will be doing math and science all summer because he has not really worked at it this year. He is in highschool now; this is not a game anymore. But he does not want to put forth the extra effort doing school well is going to require. I feel like I am a total failure at this homeschool thing because my son failed his algebra test and will be doing science this summer because of his shoddy work. I feel like maybe if he had been in school all this time he would not be in this pickle. I feel like if he had been in school all this time he would know how to study better. I feel like I have devoted my life to homeschooling my kids well, and if they are failing something, then by default, so am I.
I need to gain some perspective. He is not getting girls pregnant, smoking pot, or creating general mayhem in the community. But is this really the stick by which I want to measure my kids? Of course it could be worse, much worse in fact. But it could also be so much better. In the grand scheme of things, failing highschool physical science and algebra 1 are not on par with ax murdering. I just want to see greatness in my kids. I know it is in there. How do I get it out?

Sigh…tomorrow is another day. I need to go talk to the Lord about all this.

2 comments:

Karen said...

It could definitely be worse! While my kiddos are still young, and I haven't been there yet, I can empathize. One good thing is that he shows great strength in literature and bible studies. He may just not have a bent toward the sciences and may find a perfect future in something that avoids those for the most part.

I'd probably look at the minimum requirements he has to have in science and math and let him concentrate more on some great english studies as he goes into high school. There are plenty of kids who don't know the pythagorean theorem, but can write an awesome research paper :)

Maybe knowing that there is an end in sight if he completes X classes in these required subjects then he can help choose some of the interest led studies could help him with his motivation.

Tricia said...

Thank you Karen, you are right. It is so easy to see the one (or in this case 2) areas he is failing, and forget about all the areas he is excelling.
After he and his dad went over some of the Algebra problems, my dh assured me he does indeed know how to do it. He simply didn't memorize the formulas.
All will be okay. The world will not end if my son is not a scientist or a mathematician. God has a plan for him.
I am wracking my brain trying to figure out an occupation he can have that revolves around the soccer ball! :o)
Thanks for the encouragement!